Friday, March 19, 2010

A users' guide to bringing back the 70's


The new movie The Runaways, a biopic on Joan Jett's 1970's rise to fame, is a cause for celebration. No I haven't seen it, but I have seen pictures of its teen idol stars--giving the Paramus Mall a rest--and suiting up in one-sies, feathered middle parts...

...and my personal favorite--shoulder pads. And we are just beginning to fight-- there are a slew of looks from the qualuude era that demand our renewed attention. But with great 70's style, comes great responsibility. Let me be perfectly clear about what we should bring back and what we shouldn't:
BRING BACK:

Twin barrettes and the men who love them.

LEAVE BEHIND:

Grapefruit halves. Excessive use of Marischino Cherries.

BRING BACK:

Horizantal hot pink motherfucking stripes.

LEAVE BEHIND:

Children's toys that cause fever dreams

BRING BACK:

Wearing throw blankets outside the living room

LEAVE BEHIND:

Genocidal Elvis impersonators

BRING BACK:

Being pissed off about having your picture taken and then having that picture framed because, frankly, you both look sexy.

LEAVE BEHIND:

Having high expectations for that popular swinger's club you've heard about, but winding up stuck with this crowd.

BRING BACK:

Wood-paneled station wagons.

LEAVE BEHIND:

Again Marischino cherries. I just want to be clear.

BRING BACK:


Apartments that look like this. And the women who live in them.

ON THE FENCE:

Victor Garber in suspenders playing Jesus. I'm going to let fate handle this one.

22 comments:

WendyB said...

Saw the movie last night -- as a movie, very average biopic, but the fashion and music were great.

Love the framed pouty picture in this post.

Jennifer Fabulous said...

I can't wait to see this film!!

And I love this post. There are so many fabulous things from the 70s I wish we could bring back...and yes, so many terrible things that should stay there, never to be seen again. Lol.

bellisimama said...

oh shit, that was such a hilarious post!

jean said...

Wow its so hallucinating to think of Victor Garber in Godspell!Handsome devil and still is.

Morgan, Hi! said...

HAH! This was great! Well done.

Anonymous said...

i realised after i sent the photo that both our mumspirations are called marilyn!.. thanks so much for loving that photo of us all at dinner in istanbul, glammamas forever!
tamara xxx

Piper Weiss said...

marilyn is such an awesome name. its exclusive to the generation of carol, barbara, janet, and peg.

here's a stoney baloney thought: jessica, emily and kristin are totally the new marilyn, et al. in about 15 years

Bill said...

i laughed... i cried... it became a part of me. my personal favorite... "horizontal hot pink motherfucking stripes!" hell yes...

your blog kicks ass...

Scarlett said...

that was fantastic. especially the motherf***ing stripes!

Buppo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
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